rave on and tell me that you love me

The flower in our path

Electric magenta in the bright bright sun

The green so lush all around

And dappled shadows on the ground.

I saw you move to touch the bud

A darting tip of tongue between your parted lips.

That seemed to wake a horned beast beside us.

The shades of red and pink are not what stir the bull,

It is the movement of the cape.

Or is it your rose lips that part

And leave a little ‘o’ right where a straw would fit?

Is it the breasts whose nipples I imagine

Pressing darker fuchsia through the cotton?

Perhaps it’s your hands

Just big enough to gently hold

The ballocks of the bull

Who snorts and paws the ground

And lowers his head to charge?

Is it our mutual dance and tease

With lips and tongues

And vivid conversation?

And who is the matador on their toes

And who is the maddened bull

That rages at the red?

I heard Rumi wrestling with Pablo Neruda in the park in Wakefield.

Their verses were clashing like arms and legs.

The dark water broke the light into white leaves rustling on the waves.

The dark light entered your eyes and made them black with desire.

The sun rode on the clouds like a boat and bobbed the one bright spot

That shone from the centre of your pupils.

Why does the light cause its opposite?

The eagle flew low over the water and called the count

As Neruda was lying pinned on the grass.

Your lips half opened as they read their poems

And I bent to close those soft fleshy gates to heaven

With my own awkward mouth

Like a cup seeking the nectar that will be poured into it.

Neruda heaves like a beast and sends Rumi skyward

Flying off like the dove that the eagle hunts.

He rises victorious and sinks his legs into the solid earth,

Clutching at our sides as we embrace.

I kiss you on a glorious day in the park in Wakefield.

There is a breeze that clothes my skin in air

And cools the beads of sweat that gather there.

It bends back the blades of grass

And sways the heads of trees.

The branches wave like arms on dancers

And leaves flash like schools of fish

In blue waters filled with light.

The hues of green fill my eyes

With bursting colour til they weep.

The smell of lilacs cuts through me like a knife.

I gasp for breath and seek your hand.

I turn to see your smiling face.

There is the empty space

Your body left.

Will you be there again beside me as we walk?

Will our fingers seek each other out like tongues in heat?

The world comes in and licks my senses open.

I receive your presence like passion that drives

And pushes in your holy essence.

It is the edge of Friday eve.

Oh come possess me with your love!

We walk into the wooded park

In the other world and stay.

But is there any way

To keep the dogs at bay?

The sun shines high

The air is cool

The lumbering trees

Surround our hill.

And we descend

Within our bubble

Within this world

Where we can stray.

But is there any way

To keep the dogs at bay?

The scent of flowering

Flows around us

The breeze just kisses us  

With lips so dry and fresh.

And water in the creek

Flows by us on the bank

And I kiss your open mouth

With my wet longing.

Just stay right there you say.

But is there any way?

And is there any way

To keep the dogs at bay?

Holding hands we walk the path,

The music from across the lake.

The huge and ancient trees

Hang down their leaves

And keep us safe

Together in our bed

Of greening grass and twisted sheets

Just stay right there you say.

But is there any way?

Like children in a bow’r of branch

We see the fruit of love and knowledge

Hanging low above our heads

And bite the juicy flesh.

We could not help but taste the pear

And as I move into your heart

My salty tongue meets yours

And stay right there you say.

But the world revolves.

It all dissolves

In liquid down our legs,

The remnant of the flowing river.

Where are we now?

The garden’s gone.

The trees are gone

The grass has disappeared.

And I am far again away.

So what remains to watch the dogs

Who wait to have their day?

Our love still joins us

Though we’re apart.

It stays right here and stays right there

and does not move. 

I close my eyes and see your face

And whisper to the wind,

“This is the way the way

To keep those dogs at bay.”

Driving through the hills of Gatineau

I see the ancient giants of the Shield

Lift their bony heads and hands

Above their stone wracked bodies.

Bent and doubled by the earth

Flattened by the rain and wind

And dropped by disappearing ground.

Their mossy faces stare

From grass lined mounds

As bikers cycle up their sides

Like flies all swarming.

We stop to look at lakes

Like dull emeralds embedded in the

Bowls of crust

Upthrust and turned again

Like the mud pies of

God’s children

Hardened and baked

To receive the rush of water

From the depths of old and weathered soil.

We hear the birdsong echo through the tall pines,

The younglings of this forest

Who in their first exuberance,

Dare to claim it as their own.

We stand upon the crest

Of ridges cut by the saws of

Nature’s rumbling mantle

And see the flat lands around about

Painted with fields and roads and the sinuous blue river

That snakes its way around the borders of our vision.

We see the shape of the world

As if we could reach out

And touch the hazy circle’s edge

Sketched against a bright blue sky streaked with white scratches.

We kiss and chase away the flies who have no purchase.

We hold hands as if we too could claim this universe

And coddling the wonder and awe and beauty between us

We embrace to trap it in our hearts

And pulled by this force of nature

Together

We drive the beauty deeper in

Until we’re left breathless

And unable to speak

And unable to say in words

What we both now know.

O Love what wonders lie

In the Hills of Gatineau!

Last night I lay between your legs and pushed

Like a mother giving birth

And tried to turn my inside out

And into you,

You tender lover

Taking every thrust

And turning it to yours

Like sinusoidal waves

on a sinuous snake

That moves through time

like mountains.

Until I fall

full fathom five

into that depth

that resists me

And presses my body into

a spout

that drains my love

and pours me out

A curled up form

that suckles on the tips

of tulips

and drinks the nectar of the gods

from the clefts of oysters.

The swollen weight of love

still fills

the sack of pollen

carried from the flower.

The tender teats of cows

engorged in pain

until the gentle squeeze

brings forth a steady stream of white

like a star that shoots

up to the sky and bursts

leaving brilliant lights above

and me

all empty of the load I bore

and nursing the single thought

of you

that fills the empty space

like a meal.

Like a sated babe in a cradle,

I smile

and sleep

and dream of you.

At the first touch

The heat radiates from you

like sun

burning my finger tips

like bare feet

on scorched sand.

To parch the thirst or hunger

that slowly grows

like a straighening plant that reaches for light

my tongue explores

the nooks and crannies like a snake

seeking shade

in the rock

until the very soil of your body heaves up

and gives up its deep buried moistness

like honey oozing through cracks

in the surface.

And like wild beasts at a cooling oasis

I lap up the sweetness

and kiss the dark recesses from where it’s flowing

into my waiting opened lips

And roll it in my mouth like thick caramel

enclosed in chocolate.

And when I enter you

it’s like diving into an ice cold lake

and we both gasp

and brace against the shock

opening both our eyes to see.

I am blinded by the brilliance

of your hot white soul

which surrounds me like spirit

And swallows my whole being

into your vast depths

And love itself will take me down

to your very foundation

and lead me back into this world.

And as I reach the very precipice of here

I turn to catch that last glimpse

of your disappearing shadow

Oh ecstasy that shoots into you

and recoils my body into your bed

And leaves us like twin infants entwined

and sleeping on the ground.

Oh love, be with me tonight!

You remove the hand that’s on your shoulder.

“I’m doing taxes, can’t you see?”

You slip through my hug like water.

“It hurts my neck,” you say.

You evade the kiss that’s for your lips

And turn your cheek to receive it.

And shall I come to bed with you tonight?

“Oh, no.  Your snore won’t let me sleep.”

But when it’s cold, you insist I wear a hat.

In Winter: “The wind is blowing.  Wear a sweater.”

In Summer: “Make sure you wear a hat against the sun.”

Make sure you eat enough and drink your water.

Did you take your pill tonight?

And does your phone need charging?

I could sink almost beneath the weight of your concern.

And, when I sicken and lie dying

Why then perhaps you’ll take me in your arms

And hold me as you did when we were young.

A tear perhaps will drop upon my face

And I will look up to suck the love like moisture in a dry season.

And then perhaps your face leans low

Your lips brush against my own

And in a whisper none can hear but me, you say,

“You know I’ve always loved you.”

And with my dying breath, I’ll answer low

The mumbled words of my own.

And as you lean still closer to my mouth,

I’ll let my spirit out and you can clutch my body

And make it yours.

Without you I am adrift in the ocean

The giant waves looming over me like mountains

The cold seeping through my veins to pierce me like an arrow. 

Without you I would not think of the sparkling snow

In the dark winter outside the window

Sending little shards of light towards my eye, in the glare of the stars. 

Without you I would seek my sleep

In the makeshift bed

That is my easy chair, and plunge unthinking into oblivion. 

But like a warm draught of heady brew

You mount to my head like a vision

That lifts me as it rises. 

You draw me upward

To crest the wave where the moon

Is almost within my grasp. 

And I swim with powerful strokes

To the white sandy shores

Of the island where you stand and beckon. 

It is the thought of you that’s waiting

Your smile so open

Your eyes still twinkling in the whiteness 

Your beautiful body that takes my own

Enfolds me slowly in its depths

And draws me home 

Where I can drink from the wells of your loving

And lick the nectar from your depths

And pour my own love into your very heart. 

Your warm and loving heart. 

Oh God! I long to be with you tonight.

In the midst of many people

I turn to take your hand

and grab the empty air. 

It is not there.

While laughing at a joke

I peek to see

if you are also smiling.

The space where

your face should be

is empty.

It is not there.

I think of something you might like

and turn to speak

where you lend an ear.

A pang of fear

goes through me like a knife.

You are not there.

A silent gloom envelopes me

I pray there is a there

where you are present.

And do you think of me

or search for my distant hand?

And are we both asking, “where”?

And are we joined in longing

and kissing phantom lips?

Or am I here alone

with my imagination

kissing empty air

that’s truly empty?

Oh are you there?

Oh are you there?